Always Do Your Best

I read the book, The Four Agreements, several years ago and was inspired by the volume of wisdom contained in such a small book. For those of you who have not read, The Four Agreements, here they are for easy reference:

1) Be Impeccable With Your Word
2) Don't Take Anything Personally
3) Don't Make Assumptions
4) Always Do Your Best

In spirit, I feel the above agreements are wonderful guidelines to live one's life by. However, I take issue with the common interpretation of, "Always do your best".

Growing up in a family of over-achievers, this phrase was practically a family mantra. While my family members acquired impressive resumes of achievements and accomplishments by following this mantra, they paid a great price for those accomplishments.

Most people interpret the phrase, "Always do your best" in a single minded and narrowly focused manner. Most people expend their energy doing their best on a single aspect of their lives while neglecting every other aspect of their life.

The Biography Channel, Professional Sports, the Olympics and People magazine are full of highly accomplished and successful people who have miserable marriages, messed-up children, and are generally a very unhappy lot.

My favorite (hypothetical) example of the "Always do your best" fiasco involves a Minister or Pediatrician who is married with children. These humanitarians focus single-mindedly on building an orphanage/clinic to save the children. However, while doing their best on the project they neglected their own spouse and children. While the orphanage/clinic might help the community and save many children - they destroyed their marriage and lost their own children in the process.

My preferred interpretation of the the phrase, "Always do your best" is as follows: Always do your best...but not at the expense of your life. There is something to be said for moderation in everything.

In the words of the comedian Dennis Miller, "That's just my opinion...I could be wrong..." ;-)


Ruiz, D. M. (1997). The four agreements: A practical guide to personal freedom. San Rafael, CA: Amber-Allen Publishing.